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Win The War On Your Mind
By Brian Price 8/10/2017

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Battling Bad Thoughts

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"... it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel." - Genesis 3:15

The Bible makes an interesting promise to the Devil in the beginning. The seed of the woman would be bruised on his heel by the adversary the devil, but he would bruise his head. In other words, although a minor wound might be inflicted on the champion, yet the champion would eventually get the victory and stomp the devil's head into the ground.

I am writing to you this day as a victor over the devil. Long years and agonizing torment has been given to me, and as the Bible says, "...all the days of the afflicted are evil." - Proverbs 15:15

My story begins in 2004. Back in 2004, I married a girl at age 19. As a newly married couple in the U.S. Military, we experienced a lot of misunderstanding and within a year and a half, she separated from me. The marriage subsequently failed and as a result, I have since been trying to stay in my daughter's life. To this day, my daughter's whereabouts are unknown.

For the past 12 years, my daughter has traveled with her mother from Germany, to Florida, to North Carolina, to Wisconsin, to Idaho, to Colorado, and finally back to Germany. The last I heard, she was with her mother in Germany with the new husband.

Heart break and immense pain has been in my life surrounding this first marriage and divorce, not only because I lost my first wife who I loved dearly, but also because she betrayed me and has since taken my daughter to God only knows where.

After this divorce, I waited for 4 years before trying to find love again. I went against my parents' good counsel and shortly after, I remarried to a woman outside of my culture. We had 2 children within the short amount of time we were married and since then, she filed for divorced and they have relocated to Miami, to which I hope to soon move to in order to be closer to the children.

It has now been over 4 years since the failure of my second marriage, and since the loss and heart ache I have experienced from both failed marriages, I know exactly what it is like to lose at life. Sometimes we lose in life because of poor decisions. Some times it is the decisions of those closest to us. Sometimes it's just a matter of misfortune.

All during these years, I have also suffered tremendously with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), which somehow causes the mind to unnaturally focus on the worst possible thoughts and fears as opposed to a normal mind which tends to dismiss bad thoughts at a whim. For a person with OCD, constant study of intrusive, unwanted thoughts leads to more intrusive unwanted thoughts, creating a sort of quicksand scenario in the mind. The more resistance to the bad thoughts, the more the person begins to sink and be overcome.

Along with these intrusive thoughts come fears of blaspheming God and temptations to say unforgivable words.

"28 Verily I say unto you, All sins shall be forgiven unto the sons of men, and blasphemies wherewith soever they shall blaspheme:
29 But he that shall blaspheme against the Holy Ghost hath never forgiveness, but is in danger of eternal damnation." - Mark 3:28-29

During the inquisition from the Catholic Church in the 1700's, a story was told of how the Christians were kept in a dungeon by the inquisitors. And in this dungeon the inquisitors would try to force the Christian to deny Jesus and embrace the Virgin Mary, but then right below their feet was a trap door which would swing open to a pit full of spikes. So if or when the Christian would deny Christ, the door would swing open and the Christian would fall straight to his death to the spikes.

Of course this was a lose-lose situation for the Christian. For if he became weak and denied his God, the doors would swing open and he would fall to his death. At the first, his thought would be that doing such a thing would be a relief to his torment, but at the end, he would realize that denying Christ did no good at all except to bring about his death in a painful and gruesome way.

If he still confessed Jesus as Lord, and if he refused to embrace the Virgin Mary, the doors would still swing open and he would fall to his death.

All we know from history is that these Christians suffered and died at the hands of their tormentors. But what we don't know is who made it to paradise, and who fell not only to the spikes below, but also to the fiery pit beneath we call Hell.

Faithfulness sometimes comes at a cost, but faithfulness always brings at the last a victory and a reward.

Because supposing that those who steadfastly confessed Jesus Christ up until the time of their death, though they died painfully, yet because of their steadfastness to adhere to their faith, Jesus promised them, "Be thou faithful unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life." - Revelation 2:10

So although in this life they died a horrendous death, yet we can see from scripture that their last end is paradise.

For me, life with OCD has been a constant test of denying Christ and embracing vanity or choosing rather to confess him steadfastly and embrace whatever may come.

Combine this test to curse with total ruin of everything, and this has now become a constant life or death situation to either bless God and live, or curse God and die.

For me my friends, I stand before you this day as a victor and a champion in Jesus Christ to say that I have chosen and will forever by the grace of God continue to choose to bless God and live.

Since my utter ruin and loss of not only my family, but also my 12 year military career, I have seen victories in ways I could never imagine possible.

As I age and progressively get older, I see that my condition of OCD has exponentially gotten worse, and that fears and torments have, like a hot oven, kindled a far greater and more painful flame than I ever thought possible to bear. And truly, NO ONE can bear the flames that I have borne unless God was with him.

Not only so, but when I would preach the gospel to haters of God whether in person or online, the words from the enemy, like poison darts, would sink fast into my mind and poison it. So not only must I resist any temptation to blame God for my misfortunes, but also I must resist any words from evil men to join them in mocking God or hating him.

Again, these are the depths of hell that I have been to.

As weeds which choke out precious fruit bearing plants take time to germinate from their seeds, so too the words of sinful men hide in the crevices of the mind only to sprout when much time has elapsed. And if one is to rid himself of demonic and hateful thinking against anything godly, he must win the war in his mind.

Since my subsequent failures, I literally can see the protruding of a heel spur in my right heel. This is not me speaking metaphorically. This is me speaking in a literal sense that a painful and tormenting spur has developed on my right heel.

I believe this to be a physical manifestation of the spiritual wound Satan has left on my heel. And I now know from personal experience that this wound left on my heel only stands as a triumphant and happy trophy to show the victory which God has given me by grinding the head of Satan into the ground with that same heel.

Let me list to you 3 of my most golden accomplishments since my failures in life:

1) The upward slope of poverty to riches.

Since before my second marriage, I cannot remember the last time I had money. I recall back in 2013, on a cold and snowing winter day, I called up my father and begged him to send me money to fix my truck which was sitting in the mechanic's shop. It was in the dead of winter, and my dad, although well off in finances, was reluctant to help because of my poor decisions in life. At the time, I felt such pain because I wished more than anything for him to help me, but again because of poor decisions and failures in life, I had to turn to others to get my car fixed.

At one point, I walked well over 3 miles in winter to work because I could not afford to put gas in my truck. I was so poor, that I had to call up my pastor and beg him to get me in touch with someone who could allow me stay in their home for $100 per month. At one point, I was even homeless for a couple days, and I even slept on the sidewalk of a church in my blanket for a night. I was so broke because of paying child support and because of supporting my then family, that for six months I slept in the cold basement of a church-friend for $100 a month. I was so thankful for what I did have and thank God I was able to enjoy some things in life despite my poverty.

To make things worse, my military career came to an abrupt end. I again made a poor decision to get on my phone while operating a vehicle on the flight-line at my work and lost rank and then was discharged because of high year tenure.

I found myself desperate and at the time, I got a girlfriend in Texas who let me live with her until I got back on my feet.

I managed to somehow, after all of that, gather a couple thousand dollars and also move into an apartment, where I found a job that I was able do well at. In less than a year, after shrinking my daily spending habits on food to only $5 per day, I began to believe that despite my failures, I could amass a fortune, and I managed to save up $10,000 in cold cash even after paying all of my bills (including child support).

To this day, I am in absolute awe because not only has it been so long since I have had more than just enough to pay my bills, but with the rate at which I am working (which is about 60 - 75 hours per week), I predict that within 5 years, I should have well over $100,000 in my savings account. I predict that within 20 years, I should have close to half a million dollars put away in investments, perhaps more.

2) My addiction to sexual lusts was reduced to less than half of what it used to be.

As I began to give up on the idea of ever getting married again, I allowed myself to spiral down a self destructive binge on sexual fantasies. Any woman I could get my hands on, I left no stone unturned in attaining them. In less than 1 year, I had slept with over 30 women. It was a time of total unrestrained indulgence.

It was not long before a good Christian friend of mine happened to be in Texas for a visit (he and myself were close friends in Delaware years before), and he told me in the most loving way that God is prepared to send me to hell if I do not get my act together. And I was so terrified at his message of reconciliation, that I began to sob and cry that I needed to change. Being a whoremonger is never God's will.

Since then, I went six months at a whopping 99% in total reduction in lust, masturbation, porn, and sexual escapades. I had not experienced such a deliverance in lust in years.

3) My mental sanity has gone from torment to absolute peace, tranquility, and transformation.

I felt so proud of myself for getting a grip on my lust and for my accomplishments with money. But none of this availed to anything so long as my mind was tainted with intrusive and unwanted thoughts of evil.

I knew deep down in my soul and my heart that I never wanted to be wicked in my mind like Satan. I never wanted to be a devil and I never wanted evil or hatred or bitterness to dwell in my mind nor my heart. Yet, because the battle for peace has been so difficult, and it was as if commanding my mind to fight the enemy was no less difficult than commanding the US armies to storm the beaches of Normandy on D-day, this is why this has become my greatest triumph in Christ to date.

Because no other battle is so important, and is so pivotal, and so instrumental to our success and victory in life, than the battle for the mind.

Corruption is everywhere. I find that my greatest fight with corruption has been any and all association with young men. For some reason or another, young men typically have the most vulgar and foul mouths as opposed to older and more mature men and women.

The amount of filth that consistently pours out of the mouths of young men has done nothing but pollute the fountains of waters in my mind. I cannot stand listening to the putrid filth that has been around me, whether it be in the work place, or whether I read the comments online on a Yahoo news article, or even hearing the music on the radio. Wherever I turn, there they are, the negative, hateful, and perverse words of people.

And this is why it is so important to guard and protect our minds from such influences, because it is the words of men that poison our minds. We read them constantly, we hear them constantly, and we are around them CONSTANTLY.

I cannot tell you how excited and happy I have become since God has begun to give me victory in my mind. It is what I am pleased about the most in my life. It is as if I can finally focus on the other things that are important.

It was not too long again, about 2 months ago, that I was laying in my bed, and this overwhelming fear of speaking words which should never be uttered were tempting me to speak them whether in my heart or in my mouth, and every bit of strength within my soul was doing everything possible not to give in, and yet somehow, as if the devil and his angels threw a net over me like the hunters did to the African slaves, I felt completely paralyzed and unable to move because of this overwhelming fear. I felt absolutely defeated and unable to get the victory at all. The harder I tried to resist, the worse they became. And more frequent they came. I could do nothing but lay there in total fear and helplessness.

But then, somehow, out of nowhere, the scripture became a voice above all of the thoughts running into my mind, and I heard the Bible speak inside my mind, and it said, "If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed." And as if someone had come over to my helpless state, and took a knife, and sliced the net open, I was set free from my bondage, and I could breathe again.

From that day forward, I have gained a tremendous will-power to resist any urges and evil thoughts and desires.

I have known what it is like to walk in the Spirit, but this time, it was different. I had never known what it was like to get total victory over my most dreadful and terrifyingly invincible adversary, which I call intrusive thoughts. Each day that passed, I was learning more and more, and I became victorious over these horrendous and demonic thoughts. I began keeping record in my phone's notepad of days where I would have total and complete rest. I would detail how I attained peace for that day. I would record and write down the things which God would lead me to do in order to get victory over the carnal mind.

I realized that not only should we sing praises and psalms to God, but also in our most darkest hour, we should pray.

I began consistently praying against any and all forms of rebellion against God. I would pray throughout the day words such as this: "Lord Jesus, I pray against any and all forms of rebellion. I renounce any and all evil thoughts that come against the Trinity. I pray against words that are wicked and I reject them. I pray let not any wicked or harmful words be found in my mind, my mouth, or my heart. I pray let only the peace and love of God be in my mind, my mouth, and my heart. I reject hatred and all forms of anger. Help me to be at peace and help me to not resist problems that arise in life."

The Bible says, "Is any among you afflicted? Let him pray." It was a simple instruction in the Bible for a terrible battle. The battle for healing over affliction comes only with prayer. It is the power of prayer that has enabled me to get the victory.

Each time when the fear or the words would try to force themselves upon my mind, I would resist them and say, "Lord Jesus, I pray against these thoughts. I pray against these words and I resist all forms of rebellion against you. I pray that only love and peace would dwell in my mind, my mouth, and my heart." And whenever I would make these strong and powerful prayers of affirmation to God, this peace and healing would quickly come to me and I was able to rest once again from any torment.

It is so important to properly RESIST the devil. Whenever demonic thoughts try to come to me, I immediately resist them and pray to God for the victory over them. No longer do I try to battle them alone because they are too strong for me alone. But when I get God involved, it is as if nothing can stand against me. I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me.

My friends, if a loser like me can get the victory, then so can you. We are more than conquerors through him that loved us. Stand against these thoughts. Stand against hatred and rebellion. Stand against it and do not allow these birds of wickedness to sit and make a nest on your head. Reject them and get them off of your head.

Last of all, pray. Let God know that you are doing everything you can to get the victory over these thoughts and ask him to help you. When everything else fails, remember to pray the most simple, yet effective prayer there is, "Help me."

"Lord God, help me. Deliver me."

Lastly, I want to end this article with a prayer of affirmation to help us all get the victory:

"Lord Jesus, I pray, I am doing all I can to stop these evil thoughts. I cast them down in the name of Jesus and I bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ. I pray help me. Help me to never say corrupt, evil words, no not in my thoughts, nor in my mouth. I pray against rebellion and hatred. I pray that only love and peace would dwell here in my mind and heart. I reject the devil and I reject demonic thinking. I pray let only godly thinking inhabit my mind. I pray against bad and evil fear. I pray let the good godly fear of the LORD dwell in my heart and mind. But help me and get rid of this bad and evil fear. Fear has torment, and I pray let your love cast out this fear. Let me get the victory in Jesus name because it is written But thanks be to God which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Dear God, Help me. Dear God, Deliver me. Save me, O my God."

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